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    Sign up with Pornhub. Magical Realm at its finest. The GM is called the "Aedile", because that's an actual Latin word for 'master of the coliseum games', or 'game-master' for short.

    What is it with authors of explicitly smutty rpg materials like this and "The Book of Erotic Fantasy" that they have to be pretentious dicks about it?

    Answer: Because in the original version he was You may now groan. The intro says you only need to know a little algebra, "and even that is relatively rare.

    Both of these are filthy fucking lies. Ability score checks are 3d10, so no you need more than two dice. Apparently you'll need this "little algebra" because you solve quadratic formulas to find out whether or not your rape slave is pregnant.

    Then you roll d10,, to find out if she's going to have quintuplets. Jesus Christ. The character sheet is eleven pages long.

    There are 20 sub-abilities including "Enunciation" and "Spatial Intelligence"; also note that by this point in chargen you have already rolled your 2d10 eighty times , which determine 5 ability scores.

    On the second page of the character sheet are the following essential measurements: manhood length, manhood circumference, anal circumference potential, vaginal circumference potential, vaginal depth potential, areola diameter, nipple length, cup size, tongue size, hymen resistance, areola hue, foot size, fist circumference, head circumference, handedness.

    These measurements are essential , because during combat your roll may cause you to accidentally start raping your opponent, and how many hitpoints they lose depends on the mismatch between the circumference of your appendage and their orifice.

    In case you missed some of that: it is possible to accidentally rape an opponent to death during normal combat.

    THEN you have to roll for other things like your height and weight and then calculate your BMI based on those , most and least attractive features, hair color, skin color, visual acuity, age which also acts as a modifier for all those abilities and sub-abilities, forcing you to go back and change all those stats again , a check to see if your Intelligence score is low enough to qualify for " Retard Strength " bonuses, birthday, social class, birthplace, number of siblings, and marital status.

    In other words, roll randomly for just about everything that any other game system would allow the player to choose for themselves, in the unlikely event that they desperately needed to know the precise size of your foot.

    Among the four-hundred and eighteen skills each character must keep track of are "Basketweaving" Hand-Eye, Common Sense , "Clockmaking" Spatial , "Delousing" Hand-Eye , "Glovemaking" Spatial , "Massage" Kinetic Charisma, Hand-Eye , "Spitting" Enunciation , and even "Urinating".

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